You never can tell...

photo caption: Random thyme flower shot, has nothing to do with this post, but I cook with it all summer long!
Thanks for all your cheers about the new haircut. I'm still a little ambivalent about it, but I know my hair went to a good cause and I'm not sorry about that bit. To answer some questions--I've had all sorts of hair styles, from Annie Lennox cropped hair in high school all the way to the long locks that were chopped off last week. To answer Diane's question, I will probably grow it out to one length again, at least to my chin...much like the photo of Harry and me on this blog. This short style keeps getting in my eyes and will be expensive to maintain, since I've got some seriously fast growing hair!

While mentioning Diane...hey, have you checked out The Inside Loop lately? Diane is one of the lovely editors. One of their special skills is turning me into someone with a British "tone" to my writing. I write the article, and they translate it from Southern USA (little grit) to Received Standard English. (Brit) Amazing, really! Luckily, fiber (fibre) festivals are the same everywhere...

I was surprised to see not one person commented on my amazing sock blocker acquisition! I love finding antique or recycled stuff that is perfect for my purposes...and I've left the sock blockers out in my hallway so I can admire them several times a day. After two and a half years of writing the blog, I still find I never can tell what people will find provocative or interesting. Like, I bet nobody even checked out those videos I linked to last time. Anyone looking forward to "You Don't Mess with the Zohan" with Adam Sandler as much as I am? (no, I guess not!? really, check out that link to the trailer. It's hilarious.)

So, I guess the question is--when the post is amusing, do you comment on what interests you? Do you comment on the questions I ask at the end? Do you never comment? What are the bits you find most interesting? ( In the end, is it all about the hair cut? :)

Here's my own response--I think the fiber, garden, cooking and dog stuff is pretty fun, but sadly, I can't show you a lot of what I'm producing, knitwear wise, because of copyright--I'm usually selling it elsewhere. That's why I rely on visiting your blogs for those glimpses of yarn,knitting, and fiber photos!

What do you think? Hints are welcome.

Party like it's...

Lag B'omer!! In short, this is a minor -and happy- holiday. Another site here explains it...it's traditional to have parties, picnics, make merry, and...get one's haircut.

Oddly, my Jewish internal clock also indicated it was time, and somehow I arranged appropriate events to revolve around the 22nd and 23rd. Although we have a calendar with all the holidays on it at home, it is sometimes hard to remember to look when there's no one to celebrate with. However, here's how it went for me!

On Wednesday, I went out antiquing with a new friend who also revels in the fiber arts. I found these:
hint. These are not complicated spaghetti measuring implements.
I was so excited to find antique sock blockers...for displaying or drying handknit socks. They are a women's size small, perhaps a wee bit small for my socks, but definitely good enough...and, they were $10 a piece! (a real deal) We picnicked outside with some ice cream and enjoyed a sunny day.

On Thursday, I made a big change. I researched and found this program that accepts donated hair for wigs that go to women who are battling cancer. It seemed reputable (there have been some concerns about these programs--ideally the hair shouldn't just be sold to make a profit...) and this charitable program was willing to take 8" of hair or more. I went to a hairdresser and gave a little more than 8" to the cause. My hair is very heavy and thick. Apparently some people do this with just one pony tail that is snipped off. The hairdresser did it with SIX ponytails. Although the USA is diverse in ethnic variety, our area is not. I was clearly "different" to this salon in the hair department. That is, I have a lot of it, and I am definitely not towheaded. Nor do I want to dye it...again, definitely an outlier!
(I'm showing this strange photo because I'm proud of this--and I hope it doesn't gross you out. After all, this too is a kind of fiber!)

On Friday, I left my house at 6 AM, drove over 100 miles, and taught at the TN Fiber Festival. It was a great time!! (this was my party and picnic, I'm telling you!) I saw several friends from the Tennessee spinning community, and my class was a blast. It was small, only 5 or so students, but every single one of them dove into learning with enthusiasm. We went from skirting a raw fleece to teasing, spinning from the lock, flick carding, hand carding and combing all in one 3 hour period. My students learned a lot. I learned something too...a 100 mile drive plus 3 hour hands-on class, standing on concrete, totally wipes me out. I was toast afterwards! So tired that I didn't snap one photo! However, I took time to visit the vendors and my friends. Then I journeyed to Nashville for an appointment (on the way home). I wasn't back at home until 7 pm at night. 230 miles and nearly 5 hours of driving later? I remember why Memorial Day weekend is a bad bad time to be in a car. Talk about traffic. Oy. Dang. Gosh I was glad to be home.

To end, I must direct you to two hilarious videos for your further haircut enjoyment. It's Lag B'omer! Get a haircut. Be sure to watch both of them...the hip traditional young Jewish guy's video AND the second one? Adam Sandler's too funny to miss.

PSST: That new friend? She's an Episcopal priest in her day job. I mentioned how great she was to one of her parishioners. The parishioner got the wrong idea and invited me to sit with her at church. (No, I haven't done gone and "seen the light." I am not losing my religious identity...nor am I the least bit tempted by it, despite feeling very isolated here sometimes.) Instead? I recognize that members of the clergy are indeed people. This one's just a lovely person; we have lots in common.

Hope you have a good laugh over the videos! What do you think of the new 'do? (No worries, even if it isn't a favorite, my hair grows really fast!)

spring has sprung

Before I go on to the main flowery event, I should mention that it was fun to have KY in the news regarding the presidential primary season. We'd assumed our primary would be so late that no one would notice. More than one person said, "What! A candidate came to Bowling Green?" That was a nice surprise...I've gone from living right near the nation's capital as a kid to a place that, well, few people even visit. While folks say our country has grown homogenized (and it has, to a degree), the differences in the politics--and what the issues are--are immense when one drives the 750 miles over here from D.C. It's been an interesting experience to try out both. (I do miss an intelligent political conversation,a big city newspaper, and knowing how everyone votes in Congress!)

I've been spinning a lot and did some "beauty shots" of some of the yarn. I'll be demonstrating spinning and perhaps selling some handspun at a local Art in the Park event on May 31st. (Locals: Fountain Square Park, 1-7 pm, check it out!) I experimented here with corkscrew yarn as described in Intertwined. The roving is from Aurelia Wool. It's NZ Halfbred wool, and has some glitz in it. I spun it into a single, then plied and corkscrewed to my heart's content on a commercial wool laceweight cone yarn. I imagine this will make someone a heck of a fun scarf.

Spring has been long, cool, and lovely. Lots of flowers, rain showers, sunny cool weather--and terrible allergies for the professor. He's been miserable. I've relished the aroma of honeysuckle and roses, and my poor guy has to rush inside because of the hard wood pollens. Yuck.

Here's a picture of our back gate and a close up of the roses. It looks like we have bouquets on the bushes right now!





We're also enjoying our annual blooming of the Missouri primrose. Long ago, someone planted a few, and each year, they reseed in more profusion. I love them! I particularly chose this photo with the old pickup truck...with the picket fence and the flowers, it seems a timeless photo. In a practical sense, we're being treated to a lot of construction noise as our neighbors have their old home renovated. (I'm happy for them, it's just loud.) What's louder are the construction projects on the city streets and the other neighbors' loud music. Sometimes I wish we could all experience spring a bit more quietly on our own--but this too is part of spring's fever!

The wool supplies are piling up for my class at the TN Fiber Festival on Friday. Last I heard, I've only got 4 students, so if you're interested, do sign up! I'd love to have you in my class. :)

Most of my knitting projects right now are top secret, but psst! Check out Elsa Sheep and Wool Company's worsted-spun sportweight yarn for delicious socks! (6.5 sts to the inch on a #1. Dye the yarn to suit your sock desires...whew, it's sumptuous stuff!)

the weekend's adventures

I had a very busy weekend. First, I went to Enchanted Yarn and Fiber with my spinning friends on Saturday. This is a brand new shop in Russellville, Kentucky. I managed to leave after trying out a new spinning wheel, and purchasing two skeins of yarn, nearly a pound of different interesting dyed fiber, and two hair sticks...but not before I dropped one and broke it. (oops, I never grew out of klutzy!) The kind ladies there gave me a new hair stick, and while embarrassed, I managed to have a lovely time. I hope to go back soon.
Then we wandered over to Roy's Pit Bar-B-Q. I had some decent barbeque, and I mention it because this kind of food is a Southern institution. They offered pulled beef or pork, chicken, and even tacos. The meat is cooked over woodsmoke on a spit (that's what the "pit" part means, the fire is in a pit) and served with cornbread or a bun. I had cornbread and it looks like a white cornmeal pancake. It's often also called johnnycake. The "sides" included coleslaw, potato salad, and baked beans. I just about rolled out of there, but gosh it was good!

Today, I drove about a mile up to campus to go hear Hillary Clinton speak. First off, note the crowded conditions of the parking lot. (the yellow Aztek is mine.)

I was surprised when I actually got to the rally site and saw this long line to go through security. (I didn't know there were this many Democrats in South-Central Kentucky!)


I chose to watch from a distance rather than go through the long security lines. After all, I had to leave by 1 pm and things looked crowded. I saw lots of fun attendees, including these politically aware St. Bernards.


I admired the campaign button souvenir stands, but didn't buy any, even though my dad has a substantial collection of political campaign buttons. They used to be free, but these were $5!

Some folks watched from even farther away than I was...at the top of the stadium.

It was a perfect day to be outside...obviously a great time for a political rally. I even managed to shoot one photo, using all my camera's tricks, where I might could see Senator Clinton speaking.

I drove up the hill for a reason though--it's hard to lug
a travel spinning wheel a mile up the hill! Luckily, the presidential candidate finished up her speech just in time. I had to rush off so I could go hang out with my spinning group on the other side of campus. After all, I have my priorities... After all this adventure, I'm going to need a week to recover from my weekend...
So, have you gone to hear a candidate? Two? Maybe, like me, you went to spin with friends or had good BBQ? Do tell!

If you live in Kentucky, please vote in Tuesday's primary!

Rosemary asked...

Rosemary asked me some questions, and I'll answer them, below! First, let me mention these public service announcements:

1) I will be teaching here at the Tennessee Fiber Festival on May 23rd, from 9 to 12. If you were even the tiniest bit interested in trying out spinning with a lot of interesting raw and washed fleeces, please sign up soon! Here's the teaser. I'm bringing:raw Romney and Rambouillet. Washed Jacobs, Finn, Texel, and maybe even Border Leicester fleeces. Hand cards. Flick cards, combs. Fingers. Spindles. Wheels. Three hours of fibery wool fun!

2) I know you were wondering, but does this woman ever actually knit? I mean, she says she does, but honestly? Here are some sneak previews of things I've tried out lately. I am especially enamored of the structural difficulties inherent in the attached I-cord curve, but it came out well...in organic cotton, no less!
OK, here's the meme:

"The rules of the game get posted at the beginning. Each player answers the questions about themselves. At the end of the post, the player then tags 5-6 people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment, letting them know they’ve been tagged and asking them to read your blog.Let the person who tagged you know when you’ve posted your answer."
I am changing the rules...although future participants are free to change them back. I will not name a ton of people at the end. I will wander over to a few folks' blogs and invite them to post on this if they feel like it. That way, no one is left on the spot, ok? If you feel like answering this, please do--and leave me a comment with a link so I can learn more about you!

1) What was I doing 10 years ago?
Crying a lot. Yes, I was. I got married June 28th, 10 years ago. In the 10 days to three weeks preceeding the wedding, I gave final exams to my high school students, closed down my classroom, moved all my belongings to my new home and retreated to my parents' house for three weeks before the wedding with my dog because my rental "couldn't be rented to someone else" with my belongings and Lucy, the friendly dog, in it. (bad housing situation. uck.) I had a morning wedding. My father decided to vacuum at 12:30 AM the night before...dirt was bothering him. I got maybe 5 hours of sleep most nights during that time. No kidding. It was the vacuum that felt like a cosmic last straw. Or maybe it was the professor's aunt, who fed her grandchild pringles in the sanctuary as I was walking down the aisle?

I didn't enjoy my wedding. I am glad to be married but the wedding was absolutely not my style or choice and the event made me miserable for months before and after. After the wedding, we went on our honeymoon to Iceland, and Cornwall and Devon in the UK. It was an amazing trip--except that I had a kidney infection from all the stress of the exams, moving, wedding nonsense, etc. I spent the entire rest of the summer in bed in my new home in North Carolina, on huge antibiotics. Lucy the dog got a bad case of kennel cough while we were away and spent the summer in bed with me.

2) What are 5 things on my to-do list for today (not in any particular order):
work out a contract's details (pretty frequent issue for a writer), dry out from a very damp walk this morning, knit/work on a sock design, drive to an appointment in Nashville and....enjoy the opportunity to visit a good grocery store in Nashville for some edible treats!

3) Snacks I enjoy:
I try very hard not to eat snacks between meals a lot!
olives, good cheese, chocolate, homemade bread and jam, tea.
anything homemade is very dangerous; I try to limit baked goods since I'd eat them all.

4) Things I would do if I were a billionaire:
A billion dollars is a lot of money, perhaps too much for one person, in my opinion. I'd figure out what I'd need to live on comfortably in a middle class sort of way and then create an investment portfolio that provided that amount with a "cushion" for emergencies. Then, I'd find a way to donate the rest of it to help others. This week in particular, there are plenty of places I could find to make that amount of money useful. (earthquake and cyclone victims? children harmed by war? children in Africa orphaned by AIDS? homeless shelters and foodbanks? you get the picture.)

5) Places I have lived:
Falls Church, Virginia
a kibbutz
Ithaca, New York
Arlington, Virginia
Durham, North Carolina
Buffalo, New York
Bowling Green, Kentucky
??? to be determined!

7) 6 people I wanna know more about:
If you want to do this questionnaire, please do! Leave me a comment and a link to follow so I can read your answers, please! Or, leave me a comment anyway?! I love to hear from you!

sheep shopping

My friend Albert is a shepherd who keeps a Romney flock. He invited me along on a journey to buy a new ram. (I'd mentioned in that earlier post that his old ram wasn't up to the job anymore.) Yesterday, I arrived at Albert's farm at 7:15 AM. I visited with his two chocolate labs, waved to the sheep, horse and cows... and we journeyed down to Tennessee in a pick-up truck with a special sheep and goat pen on the back.

It took about two and a half hours to get to Far Out Farm. Kim and her mother Jane (contact information in that link...) breed Romneys, Cotswolds, and Shetland sheep. They also have some fascinating cross-bred animals, great for wool, and some very entertaining Great Pyrenees dogs.

As Kim says, "Predators? We don't have predators. We have big white dogs!" Great Pyrenees are serious, gentle, guard dogs who mean business...they aren't pets, but working dogs. They live with the farm's 160 or so sheep.

However, as of January, the farm was taken over by a litter of puppies, big fluffy puff balls of play. There were, of course, also the other dogs: the brown farm dog taken in as a stray, and a Greater Swiss Mountain dog. (Everybody's got to have a pet or two!)

I didn't manage a lot of good photos on this trip. We were busy visiting and shopping seriously for the right ram (Albert has only 20 ewes or so and he needed just one special man--ahem-ram for the job.)

What do you look for in a herdsire? In this case, the shepherd wanted a smaller ram than his last one; his flock was getting very big, and an oversized ram produces larger lambs that may not be easy for their mother ewes to deliver. Also, we were looking for a good fleece, preferably colored (not white) and a healthy young animal. Jane and Kim separated out three potential rams for us, and also showed us those ram's sires. (dads) We got a great idea of how these younger guys would look when they were fully mature. These rams were all so cooperative that we were able to step into a small pen, examine their fleece, feet, and other features without any worry of agression. Rams can be dangerous, but these guys were very laid-back. Kim and her mother have a way with animals. Everyone was loved, petted, and discussed, from the smallest lamb to the largest ram, as we walked by. One Shetland cross ram came up to be scratched and wagged its tail whenever Kim was nearby!

We chose a white ram whose mother was colored and his father was white. This way the flock (nearly entirely dark colors) has some lighter fleece genes introduced. A handspinner, after all, can't live by brown and gray alone! Also, this ram was cooperative and good looking. Downright sexy, as young rams go!

I was sincerely restrained and did not come home with even one fleece, although some of the fleeces in the "to be skirted" pile really turned my head. This is a barn room, roughly the size of a large bedroom, full of fleece. I should get a medal for resisting the siren song...but I will be seeing some of these fleeces in just two weeks, when I teach at a festival in Tennessee. I hope I can hold back, but it's hard!

Back in the truck, I munched on my peanut butter and jam sandwich as we drove another 140 miles back towards Kentucky. The new ram, in his wire livestock crate, got a lot of attention as we drove through downtown Nashville on the highway! (sexy, I'm telling you!)


At home, Albert pulled the truck into the pasture and we opened the crate. The ram leapt out to check out his new surroundings and ewes.

I said goodbye and went home to town to rest--Getting up at 5:30 and travelling just under 300 miles before 3 in the afternoon is a little tiring! It was a fun trip, a learning experience, and I hope it'll be a successful "match" for the sheep at my friend's farm!

Next time: Rosemary's questions.
Festival Update: There was a theft of a cash box at New Hampshire Sheep and Wool. It's no longer looking like on isolated event...please help by taking responsibility and keeping your eye out when you attend a festival event! Everyone can help prevent crime--like a fibery neighborhood watch?!

Uh-Oh

I was terribly disheartened to hear of this. The short version? There was theft and vandalism, including the release of animals, at Maryland Sheep & Wool Festival this year. In a world full of terrible natural disasters and war, I've found these festivals to be almost an oasis of kindness. I attended a dozen or so events last year to do research for my new book, Fiber Gathering, and attended many others in past years. I'm teaching at a festival in just a couple of weeks. People I've met were overwhelmingly generous and friendly. The animals slept safe in their temporary barns. The vendors occasionally had losses--due to wind or rain...but not theft. This is something we, in the fiber arts community, would not expect to hear.

So, ok, why am I posting about this? The sheep or goat has left the barn, so to speak...and maybe this was just an isolated event? I hope so, but, well, here's the thing. There are dozens more festivals this year. There are literally millions of us who might attend one. We don't want even one vendor or farmer or participant to stay home because of these incidents of vandalism or theft..we want all our fiber festival friends to feel safe! I'm asking everyone to keep your eyes open. Take care, and take care of those around you. Pretend every festival is your village, and be outspoken and loving in your protection of what we care about. People, farm animals, children, precious yarn and fiber supplies? We want everyone to feel safe, welcome and appreciated at their local festival. A watchful crowd really matters in terms of everyone's well-being. Spread the word.

Please link to this blog post. Promote safety for our animals, vendors, and friends at festivals. Thank you.

glad to have a friend like you

Yesterday I visited a friend's new house and an enormous garden. We talked about her goals, her marriage, and choices. Sometimes coming home makes you realize how lucky you are with what you've got! It made my home and garden seem not too big, not too small--just the right size!

I walked past the professor's newly planted irises on my way in: Irises symbolize "faith, wisdom, promise in love, hope, wisdom & valor" in the language of flowers... how appropriate it seemed for us. It does take both wisdom, faith, and a lot of hope to fulfil a promise in love to someone else... Anyone else.


Gladioli also came up recently, and that's another one I looked up in the language of flowers reference I found online. Glads mean "generosity" or "I'm sincere." Sincere? In my gut, I think that means honest. Be generous and loving but honest when your friends want to know what you think...even if it hurts sometimes.

I've been thinking about longterm relationships--with my friends and with the professor and family. When I become someone's good friend, I hope it's for a good long time. I want to be generous and sincere to the person, and it does take wisdom, faith, hope and love, too. In less glamorous terms, it takes effort. It's not all easy.

Constancy? Also necessary, and not always convenient. In this picture, the reddish bushy thing on the right is a Japanese Maple. Last year, during our early freeze and long drought, we worried it would not come back to us. This year, it is big, hearty, and shimmering. Next to it, though, is my Schefflera. When I started college, I had a difficult roommate situation. (There was a lot of drinking and drug use going on. I wasn't doing it...) Within a few weeks, I'd found and moved into a small single room. My parents sent me a plant to celebrate my new, private "home." Part of that original arrangement is this houseplant. 17 years later, the professor and I have transplanted this so many times that I can no longer carry the plant outside each spring--it's too heavy. Harry the dog tried to bury bones in its pot (indoors) as a puppy. It's moved from upstate NY to Virginia, from Virginia to North Carolina, from there to upstate NY again, and then to Kentucky. It's such a hearty plant...and it's a commitment! It has its own special chair in the dining room near a window these days during the winter--so that Harry isn't tempted to dig!

My best friend (met her at age 12!) isn't the obsessive knitter that I am, but recently she's been knitting a lot. She was visiting her grandmother (in her 90's) and had to rush out to buy some cotton yarn and needles. Apparently she really wanted to sit with her grandmother, listen to her, and show her love and respect. However, it was hard to stay focused on it all--without something to keep her hands busy. Sometimes constancy is hard, and you need a little boost (from your knitting, or from a dining room chair!) to stay true to your purpose.

Sometimes, my flower garden is just a bunch of flowers. Lately, while I sit outside and knit, it's allowed me to think more about the quality and meaning of my friendships and relationships. Weirdly philosophic, I know, but there it is. Dependability in the blog posting thing means sometimes the post isn't always fascinating fiber twice a week--or maybe it is. Maybe it's about moral fiber?

serendipity

I'm missing Maryland Sheep and Wool, the first of many festivals I went to last year. It's bittersweet. On one hand, I wish I were there at every single event, but on the other, I'm hoping to have a much more relaxed and reasonable spring/summer/fall than last year, when I attended 12 or so events in order to do research for my book, Fiber Gathering.

As a fabulous consolation prize, spring here has been unbearably lovely. If you need a poetic interpretation of this, e.e.cumming's "in just" is just what I mean! (scroll down to that poem or maybe read them all?!)

I've spent time knitting, spinning and gardening out of doors, and my just laundered sheets are drying in the sunshine today. Strawberry season is upon us, and lasts here until mid-June. I was driving home from an appointment in Nashville and I took the older highway home in order to avoid the rush hour traffic. I followed a "Pick Your Own" strawberry sign on a whim and a few minutes later, I was in a field, filling up a basket with sweet springtime.

An aside--I'm pretty sure it was sprayed with pesticide, so that's the downer...buying local is possible here, but organic is harder. My local farmer's berries (not sprayed) cost substantially more and it's hard to beg or barter enough for one batch of jam. I may just go back to the "Pick Your Own" place. Strawberries are some of my favorite foods, and I try hard not to buy them fresh out of season...because it wastes so much energy just to ship them the thousands of miles to my table. I celebrated my local find with homemade strawberry shortcake with a vanilla cream sauce. I think I've eaten about 10 plates of this in the last 5 days. Oops.

I somehow came home with TWO good movies from the library last time-amazing luck!- and can recommend The Girl in the Cafe. I also listened to a great new book, Garden Spells by Sarah Addison Allen. It had just the right magic and Southern folk tale narrative. Perfect for spring time gardening, knitting projects, and long drives in the car.

Our roses are blooming. The professor's in charge of the flower garden around here. I made him a deal when we were first married...that whenever he had the inclination to buy me flowers, he should put some in the ground instead. As a result, we've beautified a couple of different gardens along the way, and from early spring through fall, I'm always enjoying what pops up. I also like to live in older houses because the gardens are already started. Someone before us planted flowers, and they are always such a lucky surprise. (more photos of irises, gladioli, and other treats may follow.)

Our garden is flourishing this year, or maybe I just have lower expectations than in past years! In this photo, you can see radishes up front, then the big garlic greens, and beyond, the potato patch. These aren't glamorous crops, but I am looking forward to some garlicky potatoes in a couple of months. The radishes are like little red presents. Pull up a few and decorate a green salad with color!

I focus on all alternative food sources like local farmers and my garden because the grocery store situation here hasn't been ideal. Organic and local are big buzzwords in the national media but the news hasn't really hit in our area of Kentucky. We're behind on the recycling thing, on walking or biking, etc. I've had to work hard to find healthy and fresh food. Our grocery store is part of a big chain, and it monopolizes this area. Recently, my store's been renovated and dragged kicking and screaming into this century. Today for the first time--I could buy stuffed grape leaves at the store. Bulk food? A new thing! Also, wonder of wonders, I saw organic chickens on sale. (I'll stick with buying the fresh and locally raised free range ones; I like driving by and seeing them clucking first, and I know my money goes straight to a local farmer.)

Serendipity means "an aptitude for making desirable discoveries by accident." I'd argue that it isn't luck exactly. It starts with that capability...that aptitude. I actually work pretty hard to find my luck, so I'm not embarrassed about enjoying it thoroughly and sharing it with you! I mean-- first, you have to know enough to take a risk and follow that country road towards the strawberries! Then all that's left is the wallowing in strawberry shortcake!

Thanks so much for all your kind notes to my last post. I just wish I could show you photos of all my knitting projects(alas, some is top secret; for books or other publications)--but your feedback is so kind!